I have been doing it for 11 years

I have been doing it for 11 years. The problem is fathers don’t seek help until their ass is in a vise, not at the beginning when it would have been much easier to teach them what they needed to know.

As far as organizing, I well remember my early days in 1989, trying to organize groups in Missouri and Kansas. But, I have to warn you, a father who currently has an active case should not lead a father’s group. The reason is that when a father wants to talk to you about their case, you end up talking about your own case, and not helping him. Plus, there is all the body bags you will be seeing.

In my 11 years, I have attended many funerals of fathers who gave up and committed suicide. These are fathers who have already reached their limits by the time they contact us. Spotting it can be a problem, and if you see that the father is severely depressed, you try to get them help. But as men, we tend to reject the idea of going to a shrink.

Even worse, I have held up too many fathers, as we attended the funeral of their children, who were killed by the mother. This happens in cases where the father is going to win custody, and the mother simply will not give up the kids. Statistically, mothers are the cause of 55% of all fatal child abuse.

I even tried to commit suicide, after a case in 1996, where a father I had been trying to get into counseling, shot himself in the head, but the bullet went through his head, striking and killing his daughter, also. It was an easy case to get over.

So, consider long and hard about starting a group. Far better leaders of fathers groups are women. And men are more open to them.